Blue
by Juuhachigou-eighteen
Summary: After the events of Spear Pillar, Dawn revokes her Trainer license. Discontent with the lack of criminal activity regarding the remaining faction of Team Galactic, she heads over to their headquarters in Veilstone. Slight Pandorashipping - Saturn x Dawn.
1. Up and down

**Author**'**s Note**: Shizuka Suzuhara wanted it, here it is - a little two-chapter Pandorashipping -- Saturn x Dawn/female Diamond/Pearl/Platinum game heroine -- story. Granted, this is turning out to be more of a story _about_ Saturn then the actual pairing, but that's a good thing too, right? Again, if you review, please point out any lines or sections you liked, what you thought of my characterizations, if the story dragged a little, anything and everything, but most of all tell me what I could do better on - reviews just saying "this story is great so far" are okay, and I'm always glad to know people like what I write, but those short comments don't help me with my writing.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own these characters, they belong to Nintendo and/or Satoshi Tajiri.

--

The incessant taps of a computer mouse punctuated the divine passion of the hushed laboratory. A young man sat in front of the screen, its artificial glow illuminating his pale face, mouth set tight in a childish gesture of unwillingness-to-behold. His eyes were wide and scurrying, the pupils abnormally small, the light they reflected dull and abnormal. Many looked at him and thought one word: lunacy.

Clickcliclickclk. An aerial view of Mt. Coronet. Spear Pillar. Too far. Just a dream. He had been told to keep watch over the three deities of spirit, that he had done, but they had been released, gone to where Cyrus could find them again.

Around him the lab hung in disarray, metal ceiling arms exposing their veins, sparking blood, casting electric shadows. Control panels were punched in, walls cracked, tanks and artificial uteruses shattered, seeping fluid onto the porcelain tiled floor. The man himself was cut and bruised, his once-proud uniform nearly reduced to tatters and shreds.

"Where did you go?"

His voice was a whispered scream. Traumatized. Taptaptapapptptptptpt.

"Jupiter? Cyrus? Mars?"

The screen flickered into static for a moment, an interference of some kind.

-+-

She couldn't be doing this. Shouldn't even be here. Angry adults watched her from a distance like wolves waiting for a wounded elk to die and she was just a kid.

Just a kid, really.

Nervously Dawn tugged on her scarf, flattened her skirt. She wished she'd brought pants, and a windbreaker, a parka at least. If she had it her way she'd jump back and disappear, do that right now, but she didn't kid herself. The highest-of-the-low kept her from leaving, guarding the entrance to the sacred plateau, seeming far away and low behind. Now they all stood before her, the boss standing with his back turned to a god.

Slowly Dawn's dark blue eyes trailed to the commander on her right. Her eyes were darker, she noticed. Her mouth was twisted into a snarl of spite, shock of red hair tangled.

'_You used to seem so nice_, _Mars_...'

Jupiter, she had never told her much. Just the little things, the little details that made a lot of things fall into place overtime. The commander on Dawn's left stood with her legs well-braced, mauve lipstick smeared across her face, darkening the back of her strong elegant hand. Cut below her eye. Something had happened.

It wasn't like it used to be.

The end of the world came and everyone lived on. Dawn found herself unable to continue training. Seven badges of authority and accomplishment on her shoulders, it was a shock to everyone when she renounced her license.

"But you can go so far," they said to her. "You're so talented, Dawn, one more badge then it's the real challenge. The Elite Four, toughest trainers in the region! Cynthia, she told you she'd see you again someday!"

The girl cradled them with smiles and half-hearted reassurance.

"She will," Dawn told them. "Just not as who I used to be. I might pick it up again, start over, if that's how things work."

In truth, Dawn wasn't sure what she was feeling about anyone anymore, only that she was worried about Cyrus. It switched sometimes, back to reverence, cycled through fear. Now it had begun to lapse into pity.

Yes. Yes, she had begun to pity him. It was silly of her. She didn't see him as insane. His words were very wise if you thought about them - he was a little creepy, too ambitious, but truth to be told she missed his voice.

+-+

Life was difficult now. Everywhere he went, people looked over their shoulders to keep him in sight, eyes glazed with suspicion and mistrust. Almost every time he spoke his throat tightened and his eyes watered and he felt an awful cramp and ache. His lungs collapsed, mind seized up. It became hard to breathe an--the memories were the worst. He had restricted all but the first and second floors of the Team Galactic headquarters from the general public's viewing, feeling that it was too complex - the warp panels in place of stairs made it very difficult to navigate. The place was more of a research center now, with daily tours and lab equipment, computers, Internet access, beds, washroom and a kitchen for those who wanted to visit for more than a day. If anything, Saturn's actions made the public's distrust grow. '_He's catchin' us off guard_,' they said. '_Making the group seem all friendly and for the good of the world, look where that got _'_em last time, tryin' ta rebuild the freaken universe! Nearly succeeded, too! Though that crazy-talking freak is gone I'd say that kid is following in his footsteps_.'

The blue-haired 22-year-old had sealed off Commander Mars' and Commander Jupiter's rooms, but that didn't stop him from staring down the hallway leading to Cyrus' office. He had been in there. Meetings, once or twice. With all. With one. The most interesting time had been when a grunt had caught a Pokémon. There had been a disapproving silence held around the metallic table. The grunt did all the talking, laid-back, cheerful. He had absolutely no idea what an insult, what a crime, what an _abomination_ he had become to Galactic's cause. Saturn remembered well how the grunt had paused in a rare moment of consideration. When he had stood up...ah, that had gotten a smile out of Saturn, he still heard the chair shrieking against the floor tiles like a bunch of tired children howling at a supermarket. Mars had cringed. Jupiter had shot the grunt a look that would boil flesh. And what had he produced? A Metagross.

There had been a resounding stillness. Then, for the second time, Cyrus had spoken.

"You may stay."

"Was I leaving, sir?"

That simple exchange of words had always gotten him in the end. Saturn, the instant he and the other commanders filed out and shut the door, had burst out laughing. He missed those days. He missed that clueless fool, and Mars' tantrums and Jupiter's cynicism. Even Cyrus' presence. Now there was just dust, dark and spider silk, rotting the memories of a life once grand.

There came a time when the Galactic fridges were left with nothing but beverages. Saturn was the first to notice and the first to fix. It had been a warm cloudy afternoon when he had walked the Veilstone streets to the department store, bought the groceries and headed towards the butcher shop near the gym. He knew a scientist who liked fish, so hey, pick clean the bones of Pokémon caught in the sea or stream! Everything would be fine.

He made it far as the second street. Their eyes locked for a moment, piercing the fading crowd. She spun around and hunched her shoulders down, trying to hide herself. He froze. That was all. When Dawn glanced back, just a quick look, she turned fully. Even from across the street she could see how tense he was. Saturn scowled, began to move and recite the words of before. Lake Valor...how long ago had that been? But she couldn't tear herself away. Dawn crossed the street and approached him from the side, moving in an arc to stop just inside his field of vision, her shopping bag clunking against her thigh.

He stopped moving. The cloud in his eyes remained for several moments. It hadn't just been the time at the lake. There had been a moment of defeat too, when she had left him in the laboratory.

"Are you...alright?"

Saturn's wide blue eyes moved very slowly to hers. Pale, sweating, he moved his mouth but spoke no words. Dawn shifted, feeling a swell of agony and hurried away.

She pitied all the wrong people these days.


	2. Round and round

**Author**'**s Note**: This took a while - sorry about that, I got stuck. I have decided to make this story be three chapters long - though it is true that this should be classified as a Pandorashipping fiction, really, nothing romantic is going to happen between them. It's going to be a uneasy friendship. Sorry if I like crushed your hopes a bit there, Shizuka.

As always, if you review, tell me what passages you liked, your thoughts on the characterizations and whatnot, if you think I could use a bit more description, if anything wasn't clear, and so on.

**Disclaimer**: These characters were not created by me - what you're about to read are my intrepretation of them, from Johanna to Saturn's awesome lackey pals. They belong to Nintendo and Satoshi Tajiri.

--

At times, Saturn would traverse the off-limit areas of headquarters with two of his most trusted...well...he really couldn't call them subordinates anymore. Daniel Pryce, cool and tempered with a hidden heart. Kayleigh Snow, insecure, passive and pleadingly adamant. To Saturn, the two of them had become brother and sister. To Kayleigh, Saturn was her superior and always would be. She would not disobey and now, it seemed, she could never leave him. But Daniel watched Saturn with the tension of a parent. He acted as if Saturn was permanently stuck on stage. Final round of the National Spelling Bee. Daniel knew the answer, sitting in the audience. Helpless. Do this for me. The lights were hot, burning, please don't mess up, think clearly, remember how we practiced! You can do it. The word is announced. Condominium.

C...O...N...D...  
Yes, yes that's it! Come on, you know it from here!

O...

Dread. Please, god no...

It only took a two-second glance to understand why she was lingering here, what had happened. He took a deep, crestfallen breath, shook his head, just feeling so damn _sorry_ for her that the girl kept wrapping herself up in things.

"He's been like that since forever. Day I met him, moment I saw him, the guy was excited and unpredictable as ever, but Kayleigh, you can't help Saturn. You need to realize that, because if you comfort him enough he'll start turning to you, he'll start imagining that you're a caretaker, and every time there's a problem, if he gets a memory, or messes up real bad, he'll come straight to you, and soon he won't even see you anymore. That's nothing anyone wants, Kayleigh."

She looked at him, that fear hidden deep within her eyes, and she opened her mouth and spoke in that timid, fragile soft little voice of hers.

"...It's the same with Mars and Jupiter, isn't it? Except neither of us is strong?"

The girl's voice cracked, there was a tensing of her shoulders, and Daniel knew what was coming next, but he tried to stall it.

"I wouldn't have known anything about them," he took a slow, cautious step towards her, "but you're wrong. I am trying to protect you, and our commander. Nothing more. From what, I can't say. I don't think I'll ever know. But one day you and Saturn will die. And I'll still be here. It's all I can do to keep on living."  
It didn't work. She just pressed herself against the door to Saturn's quarters, wrapped her arms around her middle, and let out a soft whine. A mourning dog.

No one ever told her how boring the world would become after you save it. The movies make it seem like regular life is a gift the heroes receive, something they instantly readjust to, but for Dawn it was torture. Team Galactic had, as far as she knew, disbanded after the departure of Cyrus. The other two commanders hadn't been seen either, the Eterna building had been shut down, it was just sitting there waiting to rot or be renovated into a stupid mall or another lab or something.

So she paced. It was all she had been doing for a long time. Indecisive. Fed up with the lack of news.

_Come back_, she pleaded, casting a glance out the window. _Give me something to do, a concrete goal, someone to __conquer_!

Team Galactic only appeared in short announcements now, public apologies from Saturn, the same thing, over and over again. Most of the time he looked perfectly fine. Only once or twice did his words catch in his throat or his brow pull and tighten and he trembled like a guilty child.

_Please go back to what you used to be_.

"Dawn!" that was her mother, Johanna, calling from the kitchen, her voice drifting upstairs, "come look at the television, it's the young man with the cat hair!"

Again!? Dawn stopped, a flare of rage coursing through her. She threw on a pair of shorts, took off her hat, pulled on a loose t-shirt, tossed her scarf aside.  
"I'm going out!"

It was her mother's idea of a perfect day: blistering hot without a trace of cloud in the sky.

She biked all the way to Veilstone, glad for the movement, the power. The grass scraped at her legs, rocks jostled her, and when she finally reached the building Dawn was damp with sweat, her long blue hair in a frizzy array of tatters. She parked her bike and bit her lip, standing before it.

The Galactic headquarters was sagging now, like it had exhaled a long-held sigh. She remembered how scary the spikes had been the first time, how it seemed to loom over the city. The worst part had been going inside, the second time, all those Galactic grunts taunting, mocking and deriding her. Their echoing voices had never gotten any quieter, no matter how far or fast she had run or what hallways and rooms she had fled into, but now it looked  
Forgotten.

"Stop pitying everything, you stupid girl," she muttered to herself, and finally Dawn opened the door and walked in, pausing and peering through the cool gloom. No lights were on. The cheerful receptionist was gone, but the computer was still humming faintly. Dawn shivered, clutching her collar. No matter how passive the place looked, it still haunted her.

Not knowing what else to do, the girl waited at the desk, drumming a rhythm with her fingers. She rung the assistance bell, looked around.

No answer.

Were they on lunch break?

Dawn found a water cooler, got herself a drink and moved back towards the door. She was still breathing pretty hard, tired from the exercise, and as she was trying to calm her heart she felt her skin become awash with cold because she realized that there was a breath that wasn't her own.

A man stepped up behind her and slid his arms around her, a knife at her gut. Dawn let out a squeak and dropped the cup, freezing when he rested his head on her shoulder and whispered, "Your sweat smell so nice, girl."

'_Turquoise hair_,' Dawn noted, strained, fighting back a raging panic. '_They __are__ here_.'

The both of them were still for a moment. He slowly moved the knife up to her throat. He was talking more, in that same smooth voice, trying to get her to m--

"Daniel!?"

The horrified shriek caused the both of them to jump, one to snarl one to cry out, the knife jolting against Dawn's skin, leaving a small cut.

A woman stared at them, her feet close together, hands tensed into worrisome fists, mouth open, face of transfixed horror.

"What are you doing?!"

He let go. Dawn placed a hand over her wound, backing away from the both of them. The woman took a small step forward, apologizing, looking as though she were about to cry, but then she finally looked at Dawn, actually saw her, and she stopped and her eyes lit up as though all problems had end.  
"You," she said, "you're the one who killed him, right?"

Dawn shook her head, keeping an eye on the male subordinate, squirming her arms about themselves as if to cast the feeling of him away.

"Oh, but you are!" she exclaimed, "Daniel, Daniel this is her!"  
"Whooptee-fuckin'-doo."

He hadn't taken his focus from the knife. And he kept glancing at her. Just quick little whips of contact.

Dawn was led by the woman, lightly gripped by the wrist and pulled down metallic corridors, onto warp panels, skipped past the fetid kitchen and nap room and all the while the woman was chatting excitedly, all the while until her voice cracked and caught and jumped.

"...Saturn?"  
They were huddled just outside the open doorway. Dawn frowned, feeling like a stalker. But he was there, all right, sitting on the reflective tiled floor. The television was off. All the lights were. When he didn't react to their presence, she flipped on the lights. He still didn't move. Dawn knew he was a bit weird, but this...

"...What's wrong wi--"  
Oh, she wasn't there anymore. Dawn took a step inside the blue and orange room. The woman was squatting next to Saturn now, shaking his shoulder.

Nothing.  
Nothing...  
Nothing.

He was moving. Rocking back and forth, very slightly. For a moment he looked at the woman at his side, stared at her with an eerie expression as if he were listening to her speak. Then he face the corner again, scooted closer to the television.

"...What's wrong with him?" Dawn asked, her voice a whisper.  
The woman looked at her, a curious expression on her face. She stood up and walked over to her. Slowly.  
"We know not to speak to him when he's like this, because when clouds come into his eyes it means he is very far away from anything else. Things happen to Saturn, bad things that leave him so fragile, an--and, and I like to think that I know, b--..."  
Dawn scrunched up her face.  
"He's deranged?"  
"Err, once in a while."

Curious, she made her way over to Saturn. She sat down in the nearest chair, not having a clue as to why or how she was supposed to be so important in all of this.

"Saturn," she began, feeling a little foolish, "do you remember me?"  
A moment of silence.  
"I can't hear you, Cyrus, the fire is so warm...so very warm and serene. She's reading to me, can't you see her? She's right there, reading with a funny arm that's not natural. It shines and stops sometimes. It shines and stops, Cyrus..."

Dawn looked at the woman for help, to interpret, but she just shrugged and folded her hands and gazed at him with a distant sympathy.

Not knowing what else to do, Dawn leaned forward and hesitantly began to stroke his head, telling him that it was all okay.

He jerked, knocking his face against her knees. She yelped and pulled her legs up, he snapped his head back and looked right into her face, and Dawn could see that he had tears brimming his eyes.

"You..." he said. "You, I, I'm 22."  
Dawn's eyebrow shot up. He looked like a boy again.  
"Err, I'm 11, going on--"  
"11," Saturn repeated, standing up. Everyone watched him. "11, I remember 11."

He walked around the chairs, positioning them differently, whispering under his breath. Dawn twisted and turned, trying to keep him in sight. The woman's eyes widened and her mouth opened and closed, she reached forward, but Saturn halted, freezing her movement. He looked at Dawn very slowly, with that same disbelieving wide-eyed stare.

"Do you like what I've done?"

The question was out of context, but she knew exactly what he was talking about. Her body stiffened, tight as sleep. Dawn turned on her heels and left, restrained anger threaded through her movements.

_Of course I'm not happy_, _Saturn_.

Peddling home in the twilight breeze, she didn't take notice of the pain tearing into her feet, how she gripped the handlebars, wrenched the bike, turned sharp as knives.  
The girl was certain of it now. Even when Cyrus wasn't there he never went away.

"How was your outing, dear?"  
"Hell."  
"What about your journey back?"  
"Torture."  
"And your friends?"  
"Scum."

Johanna smiled at the door slam, scrubbing the dishes clean. She was always moving. Dawn threw herself onto the beige couch and strangled the happy pillow, trying to come to grips w--

"You missed dinner."  
_Clench_.

"..."

She went right on talking. Behind the couch, washing a plate with a rag. The noise reminded her of a drowning deer.

"Dawn, you need to keep a better track of time. I'm not going t--"  
At every sound her nails dug and her teeth bared and clamped until sh  
"OUT!"

In truth, she was glad that her mother tried to express concern for her. That...didn't happen very often.

Her mother didn't seem to respond to the scream, which was a shame because Dawn could picture and willed that plate to fall. _You've dropped your shield, mom_.

Johanna sat and stroked what she could reach of her daughter's throat and face, her hand caressing the wound, making it sting. Dawn curled up in defiance, then gave in, rolled and sat up as well.

"If there's something bothering you I can't be the one you come to for help!"  
_Love you too_...  
"Now, I'm going to go read for a bit. I expect you know how to run the dishwasher. Be sure to turn off all the lights when you're through."

She was standing up, walking towards the stairs. Dawn looked over her shoulder.

"Most mothers don't seek complete emotional detachment from their 11-year-old daughter."

Johanna didn't even pause.


End file.
